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misaneeragoni · 2 days ago

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One Piece - Favourite characters + headcannons!

My favourite characters in a tierlist!

Listed by:

Marriage material

Best friend material

Want it as my pet

Cute as a mitten

Scarily attractive

Parent material

Left to right is decreasing in how much I'd like them to be the respective thing.

Now, for those who care (why do you? I'm a nobody, haha), here's an extensive list of reasons! + headcannons for how they'd act in these respective roles.

Marriage material

Doflamingo

Doflamingo is usually second to Kidd in my personal preference, but right now I'm on a big Doflamingo simping spree, probably due to the fact that I'm finally watching Dressrosa for the first time.

I imagine he's either a full on possessive, manipulative and absolutely terrifying husband, or you end up as a trophy wife and he barely pays you any mind, but you know what, I'd be fine with that. Chance of being killed by him: 60%.

Corazon / Rosinante

All I know about him so far is entirely through fanart and small spoilers! I think he'd be a very affectionate husband, the type to bring you small gifts (and ocassionally panic because he left the gift he bought at the cash register).

He totally has a thing for taking in stray animals and giving them a loving home, if it's cats or dogs he keeps tripping over them.

Eustass Kidd

Now Kidd will love you very very deeply and beat up every single person that dares to even make a mean joke about you, but he's also incredibly bad at showing that he cares.

He's gotta look cool, so in public he'll either act like you're just very good friends or that you're some sort of trophy wife, but amidst the crew or especially in private he gets very affectionate and clingy - being physical is so much easier than expressing yourself verbally!

He doesn't mind sharing you with Killer, but if a stranger so much as dares look at you flirtatiously they'll be lucky if they make it out alive.

Ace

Getting together with Ace is already very difficult. He keeps telling you he's not worthy of your love, so you shouldn't love him, let alone date him.

By the time you've gotten him to agree to get married, he's become a little more accepting of your love, even if those doubts never really fully go away.

He's constantly planning fun trips for the both of you and will show you off like a kid would show off their paintings. All of the Whitebeard Pirates are sick and tired of hearing about how awesome you are at this point.

Sanji

I don't think I can add anything new to this. He's constantly swooning over you and spoiling you to the moon and beyond. You get breakfast in bed, you get carried around the second your feet are the tiniest bit sore, and overall he's just so over the moon to have you that sometimes you think you're in heaven.

He's a total family man so if there's kids around you know they're getting spoiled just as much as you are. He thrives when he gets to care for others, and having his own little family makes him incredibly happy.

Sometimes you need to remind him to take it easy and stop doing so much work for everyone because he'll absolutely overdo it and put himself last.

Smoker

He is very gruff and not one for talking all that much. Oftentimes when you tell him things you'll get one of a variety of grunts in response, that you've learned to translate well over the course of your marriage.

You either get to travel with him as a marine spouse or stay safe on an island he helped you get settled down on. If you're staying on an island he's taken extra security measures and has figured out a way to have smoke permanently cloud the area around the house so noone can even find it to begin with.

He's very concerned for your safety and it shows that it's his top priority. He prefers being physically affectionate, but will ocassionally give you small yet meaningful compliments. ("You're the best.") He's usually got some small thing to bring back to you from whatever island he was last on (flowers, sweets, meaningful little gifts), but he really doesn't want you to make a big deal out of it.

Eneru / Enel

You may be married to him, but he's still god. You may be his favourite disciple, but you're still a disciple regardless. You're expected to address him using a formal title of respect and if you fail to meet his expectations you will be punished accordingly.

He does appreciate you worshipping him, but it's more transactional than a genuine loving marriage.

Best friend material!

Trafalgar Law

I found it pretty hard to choose between marriage material and best friend for Law. I do really like him, but for me personally I think he's a bit too freaky to want to be married to him. (See post-marineford: "This will be a fun operation" + manic grin).

If we're talking One Piece Party or One Piece Academy Law's personality, then sure, I'll marry that man, but cannon Law seems a bit too closed off to ever even get close enough to get to date or marry him in the first place. Keep in mind, I'm only like halfway through Dressrosa, I don't know this man's arc yet.

As a best friend, I think he's awesome. He's weird, ocassionally stoic, but also unintentionally hilarious with the way he acts, and he's the king of dry jokes. You wouldn't expect it of him, but he can be the life of the party when he wants to be.

Killer

Another tough choice between marriage and best friend! Ultimately it came down to me simply preferring Kidd's personality in marriage, whereas I do think I'm too similar to Killer and would lack excitement with him.

That's not to say there is no excitement with his man, cause there is! He's the type to support whatever crazy shenanigans you may be going for, even if he'll ocassionally hold you back from doing something that might backfire a bit too much.

If loyalty had a face it would be Killer's, you could not ask for a better best friend.

Hancock

Hancock is absolutely vicious in how she speaks of others. Which makes her the very best girl friend to have for talking shit behind people's backs! She's very funny when she does so, even if you have to put up with her major streaks of egomania all the time.

Crocodile

Do you need somebody to be assassinated? Just hit up your buddy Crocodile. He'll have his agents take care of it for you discreetly. He's a very relaxed man if he feels safe about you.

If you like to talk a lot he'll tell you to shut the hell up, but if you sit together in silence he'll think that you're very cool and companionable.

He likes to invite you out to fancy dinners, although he does expect you to dress and act the part. He doesn't tolerate fools, so if you want to remain his friend you'll have to act dignified.

Mihawk

Mihawk likes to keep you at arm's length, but he's okay with ocassionally having deep philosophical discussions together over a glass of wine.

You exchange reading recommendations with one another but mostly you both do your own things. Oftentimes you're the one that has to reach out to him to initiate contact, he's a little lazy in taking care of his social circle.

Perona

She'll only accept you as her friend if she deems you cute enough for that. Once you've gotten over the part where she wants you to do all her bidding, she's surprisingly fun to be around. She's always up for pranks and her devil fruit makes it very easy to pull them off!

I'm going to skip over the remaining characters here seeing as I don't have any ideas as to what would make them special as best friends. I've listed all of these as best friends because they've shown great loyalty (and sense of honour).

Want it as my pet

Bepo

I feel a little bad putting Bepo in the "pet" category here. He'd make an amazing best friend just the same as everyone listed in that category, I just view him as polar bear first, mink second.

And he does share some traits with say, a pet dog. His fur sheds everywhere and you constantly have to clean your clothes to get rid of it, he's constantly asking for your attention and hugs (and will apologize if you tell him off cause you don't have the time!) and sometimes wants to sit on your lap despite the fact that he's huge and very heavy.

Zoro

Zoro also shares a lot of traits with dogs. He's fiercely protective, loyal to the bitter end, he cares for his food and drink more than most other things and small things such as getting a drink make him very happy. He's low maintenance, so long as you feed him, let him train in peace and ocassionally scratch his scalp he's very content.

That said, you do need to put him on a leash when you go anywhere with him. He's very indignified by it, but you just know he's going to wander off and get lost otherwise.

Any other pets listed literally just have the reason: "omg it's so cute" or "omg it's so dorky", except for Shushu, who just absolutely deserves the world and if I think about him too much I'm going to start crying. That little dog has the most tragic story in all of One Piece.

Cute as a mitten

This category is both optional as best friends as well as lovers / marriage material.

Bartolomeo

As a best friend he'll go through thick and thin with you. His manners make it very embarassing to be around him sometimes, unless you have absolutely no shame. Secretly you think he's kinda cool for how he just doesn't give a shit though.

As your husband - oh boy. He wouldn't settle for marrying somebody he likes less than he does the Strawhats, so he absolutely dotes on you. Think Sanji, except instead of having cool moments this one's a complete slobbering mess all of the time. He'll do anything for you - but you'll also be drooled on. A lot.

Penguin

As a best friend, he's always there for any type of mischief you might be wanting to do. In fact most of the time he's the one suggesting new ideas. Especially if it comes to peeping on women. That's a secret guilty pleasure of his.

As your husband, even after you've been married to him for some years, he still becomes a shy mess from time to time. He's very respectful and polite and still can't really believe his luck that he scored somebody like you.

Marguerite

Marguerite is just so freaking adorable. The way the English dub of Amazon Lily portrayed her was definitely like she had a crush on Luffy, and those two are honestly my favourite Luffy x ship. She saved him from drowning, he saved her from remaining stone for the rest of her life and they get along very well. Also, she has a danger noodle. I love danger noodles.

Shachi

Now Shachi isn't so different from Penguin, seeing as these two have practically spent all of their lives together. Their mothers were good friends so they even got to share a crib from time to time, and it shows.

Shachi is a little more bold and confident than Penguin and will flirt abrasively with every woman he comes across. Not that he's very good at it, in fact he's rather quite bad at it. Who knew that pick-up lines were so unsuccessful? Shachi sure doesn't, and he's a bit too oblivious to catch on.

Baby 5

As her friend, you need to make sure she doesn't make horrible decisions all of the time. It's pretty exhausting, but she's a good listener and can make really funny creations with her devil fruit so she totally makes up for it.

Ikkaku

Ikkaku is always down for a good time. She's a very enthusiastic wing-woman, even if she overdoes it sometimes.

Katakuri

No idea what he's like, I'm only at Dressrosa after all. I did see fanart of him extending his jaw to eat donuts though, which just looks so dorky and so cute, so I've thrown him into this category.

Kaku

Kaku is the best. From his old-fashioned expressions to overall just being very polite and cute, this giraffe man has it all. He's very prim and proper, but he's also down to earth and a great friend to have a round.

He reminds me of Peter Parker (Spiderman) a little. A bit of a dorky nerd, but very lovable regardless.

Scarily attractive

I don't mean just attractive. I'm actually scared of these characters. There's not much to say beyond base attraction here, so I'll quickly go over them.

Domino - has one of my favourite designs in the whole series. Maybe I just like women in uniforms, who knows. We don't know anything about her beyond her seeming strict and being attracted to Hancock.

Sady - again, attraction to women in uniform, I guess. Even if hers is a little extreme. I just love the bangs covering her face so much and her colours work great together.

Monet - BIRB!!!! I love Birbs. Especially Harpies. And she looks so freaking good with those silly glasses!

Carmen - Oh, Carmen. What a lovely lady she was! It's a shame she's gone forever now. Maybe she was filler? I'm not sure. Sanji should have adopted her.

Kuro - I wish him being a strategist had been explored a little further, in terms of what strategic exploits he'd been up to in the past. Well, basically I just want more Kuro content. I feel like he's exactly the sort of psychopath that will stab you with a knife while you're kissing him. Very hot!

Caesar - Generally I do feel scared of folks who might commit genocide while I'm in their vicinity. But his design looks freaking awesome!

Kalifa - That's one sexy lady. How freaking dare she hurt Sanji, though!!

Sexy Arlong sister shark lady - Oh my god her eye looks so cool, and so does her shark tail thingy!!

Viola - Dancers are just cool in the first place, and Viola's going against Doffy, the man who oppressed her for so many years, is just admirable.

Lovely lady from Viper's squad on Skypeia - She's cool, brave and fearless! Why am I scared of her again?

Parent material

There's not much to say for why I want these characters as parents except for I think they would make good ones. Some of these we have as parents in cannon - Bellemere with Nami, Zeff with Sanji, Dadan with Ace, Sabo and Luffy, Viper with that little girl - and for the others I just have small reasons, pretty much.

Iceburg - he'd totally make his secretary change the baby's diapers because he's too lazy (and grossed out) to do it, but he'd still be there for you when he needed to (and couldn't delegate the work to anyone else).

Robin - would want to compensate for not having any parents of her own (that were ever around), so she'd be extra careful to make sure her child received all the love it would need and would never have to undergo the years of loneliness like she did. She'd read you a lot of stories and would encourage you to read from an early age.

Sometimes she enjoys the kid's books far more than you do.

Hina - no good reason, just strong sense of justice, strict and ocassionally funny mom to have.

Duval - no good reason either, but a very funny stupid dad to have.

Paulie - would need to overcome his indignity of seeing any woman showing skin to have a kid in the first place, but he'd be very careful to make sure his kid grew up right (and would dress up properly if it was a girl!)

Magellan - he's shown great responsibility and carefulness in leading Impel Down right. He might have some issues making time for parenting between being the Warden and sitting on the toilet all day, but he'd make it work. Maybe make Hannyabal do some of the dirty work for him.

If you've made it this far - thank you so much for reading!! I really wanted to throw my headcannons of these characters in the respective positions out into the void. Have a lovely day!

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